A shrai gevalt. My friends, I have become just like my grandparents, always worrying about the children.
I am worried about the kids. Yes, my own, of course, but about Jewish children in general.

A classmate of mine, Rabbi Danny Gordis who now works at the Shalem Center, a think tank in Jerusalem, brings to light the following.

An American rabbinical student spending his study year in Israel decides to celebrate his birthday at a bar in Ramallah, the seat of the Palestinian Authority. He says Ramallah is very dear to him. He invites his friends and takes pictures. On the walls behind him are hateful anti-Israel posters encouraging violence and jihad. The bar is located not far from the recently dedicated Dalal Mughrabi Square, named for a terrorist who participated in one of the worst attacks on Israeli civilians in Israel’s history. Dalal Mughrabi killed 37 innocent people including 13 children.
Gordis wasn’t amused. He has children in the IDF walking those same dangerous streets in Ramallah, targets of those very same terrorists.
Gordis also intercepted an email by a rabbinical student who wanted to buy a new tallis so he was “seeking advice about what to buy and where to get it. The student noted that there was only one stipulation, the tallit could not be made in Israel.” Boycotting Israeli goods.

He brings up as well, that “not long ago, other rabbinical students were discussing how to add relevance to their observance of Tisha B’Av. They began to compile a list of other moments in history that should be mourned. One suggested that 1948 be added…. It was time, this student said, to mourn the creation of the State of Israel.”

This rabbinical student was echoing an idea that is out there in the Jewish Community. A New Israel Fund director, Hedva Radonavitz was exposed by Wikileaks to have said, “in a hundred years, Israel would be majority Arab and the disappearance of the Jewish State would not be the tragedy that Israelis fear since it would become more democratic.” Important to note, this is not the position of the The New Israel Fund and Ms. Radovanitz was given her walking papers. But these ideas are out there in the Jewish Community. One goes like this: “Israel mistreats Palestinians and the whole world dislikes Israel. Israel has become an embarrassment for progressive Jews. Perhaps the creation of the State of Israel was a mistake.” This idea is out there in our community and this student was trying the idea on for size.

Gordis writes: “what is entirely gone [in these students] is an instinct of belonging—the visceral sense on the part of these students that they are part of a People, that the blood and the losses that were required to create the state of Israel is their blood and their loss……. The right of these rabbinical students to criticize Israel is not in question. What is lacking in their view and their approach is the sense that no matter how devoted Jews may be to humanity at large, we owe our devotion first and foremost to one particular People—our own People.”
It’s about Peoplehood. Gordis says there must be a fundamental loyalty by Jews to Jews. These young people may be angry at Israel, but loyalty? They owe us at least that!

They owe us at least that? You know, with due respect to my colleague, Danny Gordis, I am not so sure. It’s complicated. Young Jews are asking the question that my generation would not have asked but it doesn’t mean their question isn’t legitimate. Why must they be loyal to just one People, the Jewish People? In fact, they ask, why be loyal to anything at all?

Loyalty is a funny thing. We all think it is important virtue but we don’t really see it very often.

Some say, we never saw it very often. Disloyalty; which is to say, betrayal is what makes the news, even in ancient times it made the news. Shakespeare. The Caesar says as he dies “Et tu brute?” A foundational story for the Roman Empire, Brutus murders his friend and confidant, the most powerful man in the world, Julius Caesar. This famous betrayal changes history. The Christians have one of these. For a few coins, Apostle Judas betrays his friend, Jesus, leading to his execution by the Romans. Just our luck, Judas, Judah, Jew. This one hasn’t been a great story for us, but again, betrayal determines history. And by the way, Christians, at least in theory, hated betrayers. Dante’s Inferno: the lowest level of hell was for those who betrayed their friends. Even Satan hated these guys. Loyalty was the ideal, but it was the disloyalist that moved history along.

And don’t think we Jews don’t have our stories of disloyalty. We read one of those stories today. Abraham kicks his wife and kid, Hagar and Ishmael out of the house just because Sara doesn’t like them. No loyalty there. Tomorrow, Abraham is willing to sacrifice his own son; no loyalty there. Jacob betrays his twin brother Esav. Uncle Lavan betrays Jacob. Joseph’s brothers betray him. The new Pharoah betrays the Israelites. The Jewish People betray God. Jews betray Jews. In the Talmud, we read a story of a Jewish guest insulted at a party who runs to the Roman overlords and informs on all the Jews, which leads directly to the destruction of the Temple. There again, it is disloyalty, not loyalty, that changes history.

There wasn’t much loyalty then and there certainly isn’t much loyalty today. Don’t even open the newspaper in the morning. The ever growing list of public figures who have betrayed their wives: Weiner, Schwarzenegger, Spitzer, Strauss-Kahan. That’s only the recent list of infidelity and disloyalty. There are other lists and longer ones. It has not escaped my attention, by the way, that three of the four on this particular list are Jews.

I guess we don’t expect much of people in Hollywood, but even there, this one got to me. I just came upon this incident researching for this sermon. I brought it up at the kitchen table and my kids laughed at me. Abba, that’s so last year, where have you been?” But ok. Look, I like Sandra Bullock. There she was accepting the Oscar for Best Actress. She looks with tears in her eyes to her husband sitting in the audience and says, “there is no surprise that my work got better when I met you, because I never knew what it was like for someone to have my back.” Camera pans to her husband Jesse… James. That should have already given it away. But Jesse too has tears in his eyes. And then…one week later we get the news: old Jesse was having an affair with a tattoo model named Bombshell McGee. Seriously Jessie? Even in Hollywood. Bombshell McGee vs Sandra Bullock? Ok. It’s not so much about Jesse’s bad choices here. It is that Sandra Bullock was speaking to a couple hundred million people worldwide about “loyalty!” If you can have loyalty in Hollywood, you can have it anywhere she had someone she thought had her back. He didn’t.

We see disloyalty all around us, always have. It has made us into skeptics. We are loyal at our own risk. We think people have our backs and then they stab us there. Young people today ask why be loyal to anything? And it’s a very good question.
So it’s not surprising that young Jewish adults ask the question, why be loyal to the Jewish People? Why should that be important to them? What’s in it for them? What’s the point?

So believe me. I shrai gevalt. My friends, if young Jews are asking the question, what is the point of being a part of our People, we had better come up with some good answers and soon. They need to hear a good argument from us. They need to be convinced. Their loyalty is not reflexive; it is not instinctual. Their loyalty, for better or worse, must be earned.

We have to make a good argument. Well, let me start with a few arguments I won’t make because they don’t work anymore.
I am not going to tell our young people today, to be proud of the Jewish People because we are a Chosen People; that we are somehow special; that we are the People of the Book. And we always taught our kids to read and be good students and that is why we have gotten ahead. I am not going to say that we are superior somehow. Because we aren’t. Other people read books and educate their children and do just fine. There are over 2 billion Christians in the world; over a billion Muslims. They seem to be doing ok. There are only 15 million Jews in world. If we are the Chosen People, we are certainly not the only ones.

So I am not going to make the argument that we are the Chosen People.

I am also not going to make the argument that these young Jewish People are a part of a chain of tradition and they mustn’t break that chain. When I hear this argument, I think of the father in the car on the way to Hebrew School with his son screaming in protest in the back seat. And the father yells., “I suffered going to Hebrew School and by God, you are going to go the Hebrew school and suffer as well.” “You can’t let your grandparents down who came to this country as poor Jews.” “ Don’t break the chain of a proud people,” we say. But they reply: “why not break the chain? All kinds of chains have been broken in history. Peoples have come and gone throughout all the ages. Why should this People continue and why should I even care?

So I won’t be making the argument that they are a link in the chain and they mustn’t break the chain.

And I am not going to make the argument that Jews died for being Jews and you young people owe it to them to be Jewish so that our dead will not have died in vain. Jewish philosopher Emil Fackenheim, himself a Holocaust survivor, made this argument. He said that after the Holocaust, God gave the Jewish People one more commandment, the 614th commandment if you will. And that commandment? Survive. Hitler tried to annihilate us and we will defeat him by surviving. This was an enormously powerful idea in my generation as we knew survivors, our parents and grandparents were survivors. But there are young people in this congregation as I speak to you today that have never met a survivor. The Holocaust was 60 years ago. Young Jews don’t see Jews as survivors. Young Jews don’t see Jews as threatened. Anti-Semitism is rare in our society. Young Jews take for granted the existence and the strength of the State of Israel. Young Jews simply do not see it as their obligation to protect Jews and defeat Hitler.

These old arguments that just don’t work anymore.

So I am going to have to make a better one and in this case, I guess, I am going to have to make this argument in Ramallah. I will sit with my future colleague celebrating his birthday there with Palestinians. I will engage him in conversation about loyalty to Israel and to the Jewish People. If I were there with him, today, this is what I would say.

First. My young friend. I am glad you are in Ramallah. I know that you know that in this place, there are people who hate Israel, hate Jews and wish them, you and me, ill. I know you know that your being here in Ramallah, is deeply disturbing to many of us in the Jewish community. But you know what? I am glad you are here. Because being a Jew sometimes means making a disturbance. It means being radical and challenging everything especially if it involves power. It’s called in Hebrew: tzedek. The verse, “tzedek tirdof,” justice, will you pursue. It uses the term, tirdof: pursue. God expects us not only to be just but to pursue it, to create justice wherever it doesn’t exist. Moses stands toe to toe with Pharaoh and says three words that change history forever, in Hebrew: “shelach et ami“ Let My people go. “M’avdut, l’cherut,” from slavery to freedom. Freedom from tyranny is the Divine right of every human being on this earth.

And that is why, by the way, tyrants throughout history have targeted the Jews, from Pharaoh to Haman, to Torquemada, to Adolph Hitler. Because tyrants know that if there is a single Jew left in this world that Jew will cry foul. That Jew will rile people up. That Jew will cause trouble. Speaking truth to power is deeply Jewish.

And Jews speak truth to Jewish power, as well. We challenge our own leaders. The Prophets of Israel challenge the Kings of Israel. King David has his soldier Uriah killed so he could take Uriah’s wife Bat Sheva. The Prophet Nathan goes to the King, to the most powerful man ever in Israelite history: “Ata ha ish:” says Nathan. You, King David, are a sinner, a murderer, an adulterer. Here is the Prophet Jeremiah to Kings, “On your clothing is found the lifeblood of the innocent poor. You shall be put to shame.,” Here is Isaiah, shame upon the Kings: “your princes are rebellious, and companions of thieves. [They] love bribes and follows after rewards; they judge not the orphans neither does the cause of the widow reach them.”

The Prophets of Israel demanded justice even from the Kings of Israel. Then how much more so do they demand justice of us.
My young friend, I know you are in Ramallah to make a statement. You are angry at Israel’s treatment of Palestinians. I get that. Just know that it is your Judaism and the Jewish community that have brought you here. It is we who are teaching you to challenge us. It is what we hope for in you. Challenge us to make us better. Challenge us to make the world better.

Second. I’m glad you are in Ramallah because when you go home tonight, you are going to have to justify being here. You might have some of your fellow students congratulate you for being brave and standing by your convictions and going to Ramallah to make a statement. But mostly, you are going to have to justify to your peers, to your teachers, to your rabbis, to your parents, why you spent your birthday here in a place where enemies of Jews reside. And ultimately, you will have to justify it to yourself. That’s very Jewish as well. We call it “cheshbon nefesh,” an examination of one’s own soul.

Your Judaism is important to you, because it demands something from you. On Rosh Hashanah, we ask God for forgiveness of our sins. We stand toe to toe, so to speak, with ourselves and demand justice. Judaism compels us to explore the dark places in our own souls that prevent us from being who we know we should be. Musar Master, Rabbi Mendal of Satanov wrote the classic text on “cheshbon nefesh.” He speaks of three important virtues that might apply to us right here in Ramallah. The first is called “charitzut,” best translated as deliberateness. All that you do should be preceded by careful deliberation. Think before you act. Sometimes taking principled stands, like birthdays in Ramallah, are more ego than principle. Make sure that you are in Ramallah for the right reasons and the stands that you take are actually helpful to somebody. The second virtue: “emet,” truth. Be very careful when you speak in the name of truth. Clever words said with conviction don’t make something true. If you are certain you are right, most likely, you are wrong. It takes time to get to the truth. Sometimes, it takes a lifetime. So when you speak in the name of truth do so with the third virtue mentioned by the Rabbi of Satanov. He called it “anavah,” which means humility. We are not God. We are frail, vulnerable creatures trying to find our way, doing the best we can. We make mistakes. Israel makes mistakes. You and I make mistakes. Humility means to be more critical of yourself and less critical of others.
The Psalmist says: “Search out [your own] iniquities; …do a diligent search…”

“Cheshbon nesfesh.” Just as you challenge others, so must you challenge your own ideas, your own beliefs, what you think is correct and just and true.

And finally. I am glad you are in Ramallah because I know that soon, you will leave this place and go home. You are ignoring for the time being, the hateful posters on the walls. You are not thinking about Magroubi Square, just down the block. You are making a statement about occupation and the aspirations of Palestinians and I understand that. Good for you. But you and I both know something that is much more important to you than these politics. For tonight, you are going back to Jerusalem. You are going to continue your studies in rabbinical school, there. You are going to speak Hebrew. You are going to study the very same sacred texts that have been studied for thousands of years by your ancestors. . And you are going to eat with your friends, and make the minyan and watch Israelis go to work, and their kids go to school. And you will get on the buses and cross the streets and live in a Jewish country. And, I suspect, you will find this deeply satisfying.

And why is that? It is because you will be among people that know you, that share your history and culture, and your faith and your values. And that is very powerful and compelling. You may have a few friends in Ramallah who are nice to you. But you know that your home is not there. It is being in your own community that moves you somewhere deep in your soul.

We are social animals. Our brains are made to connect with others. Neuroscientists watch this happen on their computer screens. When we are around people who we know and know us, and with people who we care about and care about us: our brains release the pleasure chemical oxytocin. Our brains condition us to connect deeply with others. It is a primal human need.

Everyone needs a community in which they are noticed, and acknowledged, and appreciated, and valued and loved. No matter how hard you try to be in Ramallah, with the people there; your community is back in Jerusalem or back at Seminary in America, or back in your shul, in the Jewish community wherever you end up. Because it will be in that community where you will celebrate your marriage, and the birth of your child, and mourn the death of your parent. It will be in that community where you will rejoice in everything good that happens to you in your life and where you will get support when life breaks your heart.

The community needs us, it’s true. But you and I need the community even more so. Without it, we are like wanderers. We are just too alone. Humphry Bogart’s last line in Hemingway’s To Have and Have Not. It is a classic line and it’s true. He says: “A man alone ain’t got no chance.” A Jew alone aint got no chance. A Jew needs a home.

My young friend. I am a loyal Jew because it demands of me to fix this very broken world. And that’s important. I am a loyal Jew because it demands of me to fix my very broken self. And that is important. And I am a loyal Jew because it is among My People alone that I am fully accepted and cherished. I am loved. And that is the most important thing of all. That’s why I am a Jew… loyal to my People, first and foremost.

And you, my young friend here in Ramallah, you, have a place among us as well. So, come with me now. Let’s go back to Jerusalem and let me be the first to welcome you home.

Rabbi Bruce Dollin